Hey Al. Nice list. Our family has stayed at 13 Disney resorts over the last 6 years, and we are Annual Passholders at both WDW and DL. We bought into DVC, so we feel like we have a long-term interest in the success of the parks and resorts.

Here are a few things I wish I could tell to the new management teams...

1. Don't treat theme parks and resorts like a giant retail location.

When was the last time you planned to vacation in a mall? Believe it or not, there are many of us who go to the theme parks and resorts for a much-needed vacation, not just a hedonistic conspicuous consumption shopping trip.

We have multi-generation families, sometimes with special needs and disabilities, and we are looking for quality family time, not just spending time.

2. Don't leave guests exposed to the elements.

Shade. Shelter. Air Conditioning. Heat when necessary. Quiet spaces. Comfortable seating and people-watching areas. Places for grandma to wait in style without being plopped on a wooden bench in the hot sun. Is it really too much to ask?

3. Don't ignore your critics.

Groupthink is a terrible thing, and if you don't know the definition of groupthink, you had better find out fast. If you start to develop a culture of yes-men/women and see everyone who disagrees with you as an enemy, you will drive the company into the ground.

4. Don't build a theme park to cater to a narrow demographic if you plan to draw visitors from wide demographic.

Hip and edgy doesn't work for families. People on vacation want some normal food at normal prices once in a while. We don't need to be gouged and overstimulated at every bend.

Give us comfort and reasonable prices, treat us like intelligent human beings, and we will be there! And if we "don't get the concept," then maybe there is a problem with the concept, not us.

5. Don't build any more cookie-cutter resorts.

Has anyone noticed that Wilderness Lodge, Grand Californian and Animal Kingdom Lodge rooms are virtually identical? And that they are all small? You expect a family to stay a week there? More than once?

6. Don't tell people to stay away from your new theme park.

Promising your Annual Passholders two-park upgrades on our first visit to the park by mail, in advance, and then rescinding the offer the first week the park was open was a major PR blunder. Telling us that you wanted to make sure the experience was magical for out-of-town visitors and didn't want the park to be overrun by AP-holders... dumb, dumb, dumb move.

Is it any wonder that the restaurants failed?

7. Don't use an unsustainable business model.

It isn't the Disney brand that sustains the theme parks. The parks do not thrive on marketing. They thrive on quality, consistency, predictability plus magical elements of surprise and delight.

Happy CMs who feel they will be able to work their way up through the ranks through a stable management structure and succeed within the company will make the place sustainable for the long term. But the "idea" men and women who are promoted over the people who made the parks what they are, who undercut the integrity of the people who work there every day for years - their ideas will not sustain the company beyond the short term.

8. Don't confuse "superficial" with "show" at the parks and resorts.

Looks are not everything. Beautiful lobbies and interesting architecture only go so far. Service, comfort, and a genuine sense of relaxation and stability are essential ingredients for a good vacation destination.

People want to feel like they are being taken care of, not just being taken. If the CMs' smiles are not genuine because morale is low, believe me -- we can tell.

9. Don't sell Disneyland Resort (DLR) as a vacation destination just yet.

You want DLR to draw folks who have visited Walt Disney World (WDW)? Show us the water. No water mice -- no destination resort! Water parks, water sports, water views (well, OK, there are some water views...) Themed mini-golf indoors and out, surrey bikes around a lagoon, supervised children's programs, family gathering spaces, condos with kitchens... that really is what we want in a destination resort.

And while you are at it, please provide us with good transportation from the resorts to the parks and back. If you really want us to stay, then give us something to stay for beyond the parks, provide transportation options, and charge reasonable prices.

10. Don't forget to feed your CMs.

You are not just giving them food, you are communicating with them about how important they are for your future. If you stop providing for them in the short term and treat them like dirt, or let contractors and short-timers treat them like dirt on your behalf, then what kind of loyalty will they have for you in the long term? Or today, even?

Be nice to the people who you expect to be nice to your guests! Please! We want them to be happy. They are taking care of us, and our kids, while we are on a much needed vacation.

Roman Dirge is the artist behind the comic Lenore, (you can visit his Web site at http://www.spookyland.com) and not only did he have a comment, but also an original three-page comic to contribute to today's write-up.

I've included his comic throughout the column today, but first is the "rant" that came with it:

I am angry.

I remember being a wide-eyed child, starring out the window of my parent’s car, trying to be the first one to spot the Matterhorn. I remember the magic and wonderment I felt every time I went to Disneyland. It was a different time. It was a different kingdom.

These days, Disneyland is under the management of people that ran shopping malls. Non-creative executives helming an empire that was built on creativity.

Walt Disney was a man that shaped me as a being. An imaginative titan that saw the world through different eyes and shared his vision with the world on a level that had never been seen before. I never met the man, but like many, I feel I know him. I believe that if he saw what his dream has become in the hands of others, he would choose to return to the grave.

I’ve read every book on Disney, I live right by Disneyland, I’ve been to the park well over 500 times in my life and I’m one of those psychos that can point out the slightest thing that changes anywhere in the park. I even have Disney related tattoos. No, I don’t wear a lanyard. I’m not that crazy.

Having said all that, I cannot stand idly by any longer and just watch this downward spiral that Disney is on. The place means far too much to me.

I am angry to see stores outnumber the rides. I am angry to see these awful straight to video sequels of the classic Disney cartoons. I get angry when I see paint peeling off the walls and rides. I am angry to see the name Disney becoming synonymous with words like cheap and formulaic. I’m angry that Disney is so out of ideas that it has to dip into its pool of rides to make new movies. Country Bears? Haunted Mansion with Eddie Murphy? The Pirates of the Caribbean?

I am angry that upper management seems oblivious to all of this, sending out emails to the Disney staff saying things like "continuing to make this one of the best places to work," while a quick poll of the employees would show you otherwise.

Disneyland has their annual Christmas party at; you guessed it, Disneyland. The big perk that makes it all worth it? The employees can buy churros at a cheaper price. Woo boy. That sure is generous.

I am a comic book artist by trade and I felt this was the best way to deal with my frustration. The following comic was done in one night. One night of anger. It was cathartic and I feel a wee bit better. I now share this experience with you. I am aware that Walt wasn’t really frozen, but then I’m also aware that mice don’t really speak either.

I do have hope. I sincerely hope that this all turns around. At the time I’m writing this, one of the Disney head honchos has just jumped ship and gone to work for a large clothing chain. This, I feel, is far more appropriate a job for him and I wish him the best of luck. I leave you with a quote from that man himself that sums up much of the problem that has made Disney what it is now.

"Disney theme parks are just a giant retail location." - Paul Pressler (O. C. Register 9/27/2002)

ARGHHHH! - Part One

© 2002 Roman Dirge - This comic may be freely distributed with this notice / credit attached

Hi Al. Fantastic column this morning! After reading your 10 suggestions for Mr. Rasulo and seeing that you were looking for feedback, I couldn't wait to start writing. Here's my list of 10 things he should do:

Be A (regular) Guest: Spend a day in the parks without your nametag on. No park escorts, no boot-licking toadies at your side. Just wander around alone for a while and watch what happens. Get in line with everyone else, and listen to the stories they tell while waiting for the ride. Ask them at the end what they thought. Stand by the exit and look at the expressions on the kid's faces. You'll see that there are a lot of people - young and old - who live for the Disney magic.

Grownups love Disney, too!: Please don't forget that there are many, many, many of us 20-something, 30-something, 40-something, and beyond adults who still love to wear the occasional Mickey Mouse T-shirt or a Donald Duck wristwatch. Keep the exclusive collectibles coming, and I promise I'll buy.

Disney Parks Are Not the Disney Store: Unfortunately, the Disney Stores have practically been wiped clean of any magic in the last few years (trust me - I worked for them for five years...). The stores are now basically designed for little girls age 6 and under. Remember, it was probably their parents' love of all things Disney that turned the kiddies onto it. A Main Street packed with generic "Disney Store princess crap" isn't what the parks need.

Give Us a Reason to Come: Disney parks don't have the biggest, the fastest, the highest, or wildest rides, but what they do have is the classiest attractions. I have to travel 1200 miles to visit either Anaheim or Orlando, and I need something to convince my wife that the expense and time is worth it.

Don't Milk Us Dry: Sure, you can raise admission ticket prices or charge your captive audience $5 for a Coke. But just because you can doesn't mean you should. Not everyone has a ton of disposable income -- the parks should remain affordable and a good value for a family. (Heck - it works for Wal-Mart.) I'd love to stay onsite sometime, but why drop the added $100-$200 a night for a room that is smaller, older, and not necessarily a better value?

More Wow, Less "Ugh": See Superstar Limo. $50 a day for bottom-of-the-barrel attractions is not cool. And if I wanted to see how tortillas are made, I could watch "Unwrapped" on Food Network. Generic, off-the-shelf attractions without any "wow" factor are not the stuff of Disney - I could stay home and see that at a local park. DisneySea in Tokyo has proven that people will come in droves for quality.

Don't Entirely Kill The Past: Heck, I love seeing new stuff in the parks as much as the next guy. And sure, the Enchanted Tiki Room at Disneyland is old, but it's still 1000 times better than that disco-loving "Under New Management" ilk at the Magic Kingdom in WDW. I'd rather see the classic version of Jose, Fritz, et al. than sit through samba-bouncing Iago any day. And what would I give to see the original Golden Horseshoe Review shows again? Don't go there.

Remember Your Cast: The Disney Cast Members are the greatest. But remember that smiles start from the top and work their way down. Keep your cast happy, and it'll show through. Disney CMs are some of the hardest working people I know, and I thank them every time I visit. You should, too.

Bury the Hatchet with Mr. Lucas: Uncle Eisner may not want to make peace with George, but you should offer the first olive branch. Some of the best attractions we've seen in the past few years have come out of Skywalker Ranch and WDI working together, and the only way to keep up this relationship is for someone to make the first move.

Remember the Magic: There's a lot of magic in the Disney parks; you and I both know it. Uncle Walt worked really hard to make Disneyland the best that it could be, and now you have the chance to help restore the luster. I wish you luck and I wish you well.

The first thing Mr.Rasulo should do is go to Disneyland on a busy day and then again on a slow day and see what people are interested in. Take note of what they are buying or at least looking at or looking for. See what rides are crowded and listen to what people are complaining about. He could go in "regular Joe" clothes as not to draw a lot of attention to himself.

Next get rid of McDonalds.

Study Walt Disney's ways. He was the King, the guru, the "HEAD CHEESE!" for cryin' out loud. No one will ever be him, but learn from him.

Maybe send out at random, a couple hundred questionnaires to us APers [annual passholders] and just get an idea of what we think. As [Al] pointed out we are there the most and could be some very positive PR.

And lastly, he should be reading the discussion boards here!

I've got a top 5, not a top 10.

1. DCA's problem is not "word of mouth." Don't fall for the company line that all DCA needs is to get people through the gate, thereby increasing word of mouth. It's been proven time and again that it doesn't work (Soap Opera stars, ABC primetime stars, Music Series, etc.). The only thing that will save DCA is quality Imagineering.

2. Low risk = low reward. Ignore the bean counters. Make investments, takes some risks. Disney is getting exactly what it paid for with DCA. Don't make that same mistake.

3. Off the shelf is not the Disney way. Creative, unique concepts is what the company was built on. Outsourced and rehashed attractions purchased from design companies will lead to stagnation, and ultimately ruin.

4. Treat your paying customers like guests, not wallets with legs. In the long run, more money will be spent by people who feel they are receiving quality service, not by people looking for cheap gimmicks and shoddy merchandise.

5. Keep your ear to the ground. There are a lot of outlets we fans use to express what we want from Disney. pay attention to that. After all, if we're asking for it, clearly we'll pay for it.

This is a Top Ten list of Animals Jay should not Ignore

1. Bears - these cute and cuddly guys represent a significant part of the Disney landscape, heck even Tokyo has some! Don't give in to greedy ones that are too popular, and out perform some specialized favorites. Give other Bears homes, ASAP! You realize, a lot of your paying customers look like Bears, no?!

2. Dinosaurs - If you are indeed visiting all the theme parks Jay, there are tons of prehistoric pals around that could use some loving attention, especially ones in Disneyland.

3.Dogs - with so many Disney movies that star Dogs, its easy to use them as simply a marketing ploy. But mans best friend deserves the same kind of feature presentation in theme parks that other animals get, especially when considering that dogs can be adventurous, kid friendly, and they sing!

4. Bugs - be wary of bugs at your resorts. Oh, they look like they are going to pay off now, but they are multiplying, and some day the average numbers of bugs in your resorts will be larger than your guests! Just look at the bug problem in DCA! Don't overlook bugs now, take action from the start, otherwise you will likely lose more original attractions only to find their quality programming replaced by unwise and short-sighted slapstick.

5. Underwater life - OK, so you know how to take care of a giant squid, I've seen it myself, you did good. Guess what's in Orlando and Anaheim? Fortunately for you, the schools are still there. Now, if you really want to impress your audience, workers, families, APs, maybe even Michael and Barry; give the sea creatures some second life.

6. Pigs - who is the most valuable asset to your operations? Who are the pigs that clean your trough of all your best material? You better figure out who wants what, and how to motion your pigs, because these animals are smarter than you think. They don't necessarily buy what they see, and they don't run for the gates of the pen just because they are open. And they certainly don't roll around in any old mud, not when there are so many mud dives within your theme parks. And by the way, pigs are romantic creatures, despite the middle/low- class veneer.

7. Monkeys - keep the monkeys happy, keep the monkeys playing, let the monkeys slip up every now and again, don't make the monkeys wear diapers, don't call them monkeys because you look down on them, don't discount a monkeys monetary worth, know all monkeys for their specific breed, don't let monkeys play with fire, don't give monkeys two pieces of wood and a set of pliers and say "Build your own chair, if you're so tired!"

8. Mice, Ducks, and various - You might know their names but do you know their true selves. Maybe you consult them for promotions, do you consult them on your customers?

9. Cattle - There is a lot of cattle in your parks, and some of it is not that happy. You need to whip that cattle into shape, get involved and get it feeling good. A lot of people pass your cattle every day, they pay good money and get some sad cattle. Take the money, the high cost of your cattle, and put it back in to the cattle. Your return on investment in cattle will yield high revenue in every facet of your business. And it wouldn't hurt to give the cattle a little credit for its hard work.

10. Cats - I have seen two cats in Disneyland. The cats have been there since the '60s, rather than old ghosts, Disneyland has cats. And they appear as a solid reminder that things in Disneyland are different than the outside world. You should look for cats in Disneyland, and when you see one ask yourself: what does a cat in Disneyland, or in any theme park of Disney, mean to me?

Great article Al. I also compliment Kevin Yee; you have done a very professional job in dealing with this news.

"Disney theme parks are just a giant retail location," said Pressler.

Really, Mr Pressler? Is that what people came all the way around the world to do: just to pay $35 - $70+ dollars for the chance to shop in a Disney theme park?

Maybe Pressler has hidden his "Disney handbook." I thought Disney theme parks were places where "Age relives fond memories of the past," and where "youth may savor the challenge and promise of the future." (I guess for Pressler, that challenge and promise is how many Goofy hats can be sold in one day).

If I, or anyone for that matter, wanted to go to a "giant retail location," we wouldn't spend hundreds of dollars to go to a theme park. It's like going on vacation and eating nothing but McDonald's while you're away from home, when there was one all the way back home. Theme parks allow people to go somewhere and do things you probably couldn't do back home (fly an elephant, cruise through a mountain, or watch pirates plunder a village, etc). Sure, people will buy merchandise, but many of those people don't have exorbitant amounts to spend.

It will be interesting to hear what Pressler can do for The Gap. It does sound like he will do good things for them, but I just hope that Jay Rasulo will truly examine the parks not with the eye of a "penny pincher," but through the eyes of a Disney guest.

Now if only they could get someone to stop making their Disney Stores so "kid-heavy" with merchandise. The one thing I wanted this summer from the Disney Store was an adult-sized Lilo & Stitch T-shirt.

Well Al, you asked for it, here goes:

1. Don't Rest on Your Laurels

Disneyland hasn't had a great new E ticket in close to a decade (unless you count the Rocket Rods -- which I don't). Even D and C tickets have been severely lacking. What happened? Walt once said that the park would never be finished as long as there was imagination left in the world. Maybe someone should tell that to current management, because they've already stuck a fork in it.

While other parks like Six Flags and Cedar Fair try and best each other every year, Disney seems to think they don't have to do anything to stay on top. Wrong! All you have to do is look at the surges in attendance in the years following the opening of great rides (Splash Mountain, Indy). If You Build it, They Will Come.

2. Listen to your customers

We are the ones who foot the bills. Don't trivialize what we want. When you hear an uproar about the cutting of the 5th Dimension/horizontal movement on the Tower of Terror, listen. A few Annual Passholders could have warned you about Superstar Limo in advance; likewise for Steps in Time, Rocket Rods and Innoventions. These expensive mistakes could have been spared and built one really great E ticket that would have paid for itself for decades.

3. Make some Friends in Imagineering

They are the heart and soul of this division. Stop firing them. Without them, Disney Parks would be indistinguishable from Six Flags. Sure, they can overinflate a budget in ways that would make the Department of Defense proud, but they are easily worth their weight in gold. Repeat after me: "Imagineers are our Friends."

4. Stop Clone Mania

In a couple of years, after the Tower of Terror and The Many Adventures of Winnie the Pooh are open, there will be very few reasons for me to trek out to Orlando (or Paris or Hong Kong). Sure Mission Space promises to draw me back east at least once, but the proliferation of cloned attractions is not a good thing. Make the world come to you (as we will to DisneySea).

5. Bring Back the Era of the Epic Rides

We'd love to see a 21st Century incarnation of Pirates, Haunted Mansion or Splash Mountain. And please, don't use the Great Movie Ride as a guide: there's no heart in that attraction.

6. Camp out in the Imagineering Archives

There's countless old ideas that the public would clamor for. Don't throw money on new ideas until you've utilized some of the brilliant ideas that you've already paid for. Whatever happened to the rumored Villain Mountain, Atlantis Adventure, Geyser Mountain, Western River Expedition, or Discovery Bay?

7. Rent "Annie Get Your Gun"

Pay special attention to the number "Anything You Can Do, I Can Do Better." This should be your new credo. Universal can be the Frank to your Annie.

8. The Public Wants rides

Sure, those 3-D movies are a blast the first time around, but come on, who wants to hop back in line for a second go round on these attractions? Your customers want rides (not to be confused with "attractions"). This does not include: walk-throughs, exhibits, stage shows, animatronic shows, 3-D movies, parades, fireworks whows, water shows, portable character shows, or concerts (sorry, make that "music series"). Sure, those all can be great, but we haven't had a great new ride in Disneyland in nearly a decade.

9. O.K. Maybe a new parade

I'll briefly contradict myself to plead for a new parade or two. For the last few years, I've seen the parade offerings as more of a nuisance than anything. Disneyland used to produce great parades. From "Party Gras" to the "Lion King Celebration," the park has staged some great spectacles. What Happened?! The current parade has run for what seems like an eternity --and it's really boring. No offense to the hardworking cast members who staff this daily snoozefest; I blame the creators.

10. Lastly, Enjoy Your Job

You have what should be one of the greatest jobs in the world. Many of us here would kill for your power. Enjoy it. Be a kid. Have fun. Your cast members should love their jobs as well. It will show. Your guests will have a better experience, which will make their pocketbooks a little looser and your job will be done.

P.S. How about a column chronicling the successes and failures of the new chief? If I'm not mistaken, Disneyland Paris is as hard up for new attractions as DL is, plus the new Paris park has been received even more poorly than DCA. So why would they hire this guy? Why not the person who heads up the Tokyo resort?

While the new Paris park is a complete and total disappointment John, Rasulo basically had to work with what boss Pressler thought was adequate for the job. Needless to say you get to hear the French word "merde" quite a bit when you drop in.

I've heard some encouraging things about Rasulo, and the way he approaches his job. His recent press quotes even seem to target the main areas of complaint most customers have with the Disney parks these past eight years.

Right now I think everyone needs to give the guy a bit of space. Let's see what he's got up his sleeve. -

ARGHHHH! - Part Two

© 2002 Roman Dirge - This comic may be freely distributed with this notice / credit attached

1. Remember that Disneyland was such an enormous hit to begin with because Walt always put quality ahead of economy. Concentrate on offering the very, very best - make it a must-see and people will pay what they must to see it. Cheapen the product, and people will drift away, no matter how low the cost.

2. Remember that it was the E-ticket attractions that made Disneyland a hit. Sure, people line to shop and dine and watch shows, but it's those incredible, detailed, can't-find-them-anyplace-else rides like Pirates of the Caribbean, the Haunted Mansion and the Jungle Cruise that put Disney on the map. There hasn't been a new ride of that quality in ages, which is one big reason attendance has slipped.

3. Remember that some of Disney's biggest hit movies have never been turned into rides or major park attractions, including The Little Mermaid, Beauty & the Beast, Aladdin, Mary Poppins, The Lion King and Fantasia. Go for it!

4. Consider a Beauty and the Beast dinner theatre in the park. Sort of a cross between the Tiki Room, the Tahitian Terrace and the Country Bear stage, where guests dine in the Beast's castle while surrounded by singing, dancing, animated furnishings (to "Be Our Guest", of course), and the main B&B characters entertain from a central stage area.

5. Do something about the "new" Tomorrowland. It's a sad mess right now.

6. Do something about the empty Submarine lagoon. It stands out like a sore thumb.

7. Get the fire burning again on the "burning cabin" in Frontierland (as viewed from aboard the Mark Twain). It's a small thing that needs to be fixed, but a very noticeable one.

8. Bring the annual Candlelight Ceremony back to Town Square where it belongs, and where the public (and not just the VIPs) can enjoy this Christmas tradition.

9. A tram or shuttle back to the Disneyland Hotel (from the ticket booth area out front) would be a gracious and necessary convenience, especially for tired senior citizens and the semi-disabled, who have problems walking the entire length of Downtown Disney after a busy day.

10. Remember that simple maintenance (new paint, quick repairs, replacing light bulbs on Main Street before they burn out) is extremely important to a place that is selling a fantasy of utopian perfection. Little imperfections shatter that popular illusion. People expect the best from Disneyland. Give it to them, and they'll keep coming back just for the joy of being there.

Dear Al, First, let me just say that that I was laughing my (ahem) off after I read that "Tom 'tile murals are exciting' Fitzgerald" remark.

I hope Mr. Rasulo does well in Paul's position. No doubt Disneyland Paris has been a tough park to run, but he has been running it. So, if he can get past Eisner, here's what he can do.

NOTE: My list is strictly for the Disneyland Resort. I don't know squat about Disney World.

1. Bring back the real entertainment

No shows geared strictly at ages 2 - 8. Bring back the good shows, with the good writing. Give the actors, singers, dancers, musicians and puppeteers a challenge! Get creative. Bring back the marching band.

Acknowledge the fact that performers from California are just as good as those from a certain state on the East Coast (that alleged remark from Ms. Hamburger still gripes me). Make good entertainers want to work at the Disneyland resort.

2. Improve the way cast members are treated

Nothing boosts morale in your employees better than making sure they know they are appreciated and respected. Improve the training, if that's what caused the Columbia incident back in '97. Improve the pay, if possible. Find ways to reward good work and good attitudes. Make it so your cast members want to stay for many years.

Being a southern Californian, I know too many people who "used to work for Disneyland."

3. Don't raise the price of admission for at least three years

How many dollars did it raise this year from the previous price? $2? $3? Make sure there's a reason to raise the prices, like a new honest-to-goodness E-ticket attraction.

4. Make sure the public knows you're working on improving things

Next summer, open up an exhibit at the Disney gallery showing concept art of new attractions, land revamps, restaurants, etc. Have cast members keep an eye out for what (ideas) guests gravitate to most. On the official Web site, hold a survey asking people what they would like to see.

At least give the impression that you and your team of Imagineers are working hard to bring (really) exciting things to the Disneyland resort. If it couldn't happen in five years, let that be known. But let the public know that you're working on it.

5. Have more seasonal specials

Not just Christmas-time and New Year's, find ways to celebrate all the big holidays. In the early '80s, there was "Thumpers Easter Egg Hunt." We celebrated Donald Duck and Mickey Mouse's birthdays.

If there can't be discounts, create promotional reasons for guests to come at various times of the year. Give the first 10,000 children through the gates little Mickeys on his birthday (his 75th is next year). Give people coupons at "Great Moments with Mr. Lincoln" for a free piece of pumpkin or apple pie at the bakery on Thanksgiving (he did establish the holiday, I'm told), or cherry or apple pie at the 4th of July. Have a drawing everyday in the month of February for a romantic weekend at the Grand Californian (with something special for the kids, too).

The slices of pie don't have to be big, and the toys don't have to be amazing. You don't even have to use those ideas. But people love free stuff, and if you offer it, they will come.

6. Continue bringing in the park-themed souvenirs

Bring on the attraction posters! Bring on anything attraction- themed. Bring on anything Disneyland-themed. To continue this...

7. Reduce the generic souvenirs

It's perfectly okay to have those lighty-twirly-thingies, but reduce the number of locations for them. Make more unique-to-the-land items and less generic items. It'll pique the guest's interest more, and possibly result in more money being spent. If anything, it'll result in souvenirs guest not only buy, but truly cherish (how's that for a spin?).

8. Refurbish the attractions you already have, constantly

Maybe the Enchanted Tiki Room is going the way of the dodo, but the least you can do is make sure what you have still works well and looks nice. The sooner you fix it, the less it will cost to fix.

9. Do the same eight things above, with variations to thing 1, for DCA

Yeah, if you can't overhaul it overnight, continue making it the best theme park it can be right now.

10. Create excitement for a third park

If that's still on the list of things to do, throw around ideas to the public by way of gossip. Keep it monitored. If you hear poor buzz from the people, figure out how to bring DisneySea or something just as good to California.

Overall, please just give everyone hope that you have the resort's best interests at heart.

Hi Al! I am so glad for Paul Pressler and the Gap. I agree, let him go be successful in an environment where he belongs. It's such a relief to know that the "King of Plush" is no longer in control.

I don't have a top 10 list, but I do have one concern, and I'm not even sure if Mr. Rasulo has any control over this. Get the Disney lawyers back under control. They've become so lawsuit paranoid that it's getting ridiculous. The "safety tape" on the steps leading to the Princess Aurora statue is ugly and absurd. There's always going to be some sue-happy guests, not matter what.

For the most part I really feel that the Park does a very good job making sure guests are happy and safe. There's always room for improvement. The tape is definitely not one of those improvements. I get the impression that the castle walk through is closed because of safety fears? Pity. It was one of my favorite things.

Thanks for all the good reports. Everyone does an excellent job on the site!

My top 10 list for James A. Rasulo:

1. Bring back the Submarine Voyage.

2. Bring back the People Mover.

3. Move the Electrical Parade back to Disneyland.

4. Repaint Tomorrowland like it used to be.

5. Dump Innovations and put in a dark ride, or bring back Carousel of Progress.

6. Get a 3-D movie as good as Magic Journeys was, dump "Honey, I Shrunk the Audience."

7. Make California Adventure another land in Disneyland.

8. Lower ticket prices and charge less for food and drinks. This will actually make them more money, especially if DCA becomes part of Disneyland allowing larger crowds.

9. Put the Pirate Ship and Skull Rock Cove back in Fantasyland.

10. Bring back The Lion King Parade.

"Disney theme parks are just a giant retail location"

Famous Last Words. I must admit, when I heard the news, "Ding Dong The Witch Is Dead" played in my head. When I was an employee of The Disney Store, he was in charge of that branch, and he knew what he was doing. The merchandise was great, the atmosphere fun, and I looked forward working there every day.

He knows what to do when it comes to retail....but that's about it. The fact he thought that "Disney theme parks are just a giant retail location," Shows how much he was interested in the quality of the rides.. I will not miss Presser one bit, but The Gap is getting an expert in merchandising and retail, which is something the company needs at this time.

As for the new guy, my only request is that he doesn't make decisions that makes things worse. If you are gonna get rid of something, at least replace it with something just as good or better. I remember as a kid how disgruntled I was when they shut down Journey Thru Inner Space. However, it was replaced with the wonderful Star Tours. Brilliant decision. When the ultra-relaxing People Movers were removed, they were replaced with the ultra annoying Rocket Rods. Rotten decision.

If you are gonna transplant a ride from another theme park, at least keep its show close to the original as possible. And speaking of show, bring it back. The photos I have seen to Flik's Fun Fair is the closest I have seen to theme park show I have seen yet in DCA.

As for DCA, your first act is to change the name of DCA, Get rid of the California theme, and fix that damn park to make it semi-worth the admission! Just drop the word California and call it Disney's State of Adventure. Fixed.

Here is my list of top 10 things James Rasulo should do. By the way, I adore the column!

1. Remember quality

Stop with the Dumbo rides already! No more "cleverly" themed roadside carnivals, no more cutting corners, no more aiming low. Imitate the Japanese and take pride in everything you do.

2. Give the people everything you can give them

This is how Disney got so far ahead of the game in the first place. Lavish the attractions, parades, and shows on us. We will be more faithful than you could ever know.

3. Keep it clean

Hire more maintenance CMs, sweepers, and third shift cleaners.

4. Keep it friendly

Hire CMs who actually love Disney, not run-of-the-mill employees who are treating their work as a summer job at McDonald's. Once you have them (like Maynard), don't let them go!

5. Remember family!

Disneyland was meant to be a park where families could have fun with their children together, not one sits on a park bench while the other rides Rock'n'Rollercoaster. Make family oriented rides and leave the thrill craze to others.

6. Don't compete - lead!

You are not in charge of the Six Flags theme parks. You are Disney. You should not care what other parks are doing. Remember, the true runaway hits of pop culture have always been unexpected, not the things that were popular before. Be innovative.

7. Keep off the shelf on the shelf

Make your own attractions from scratch, just like Uncle Walt used to make. In its heart, Disney is still a family business. Keep it in the family.

8. Listen to the loyal customer

Treat every complaint that comes to you via e-mail or regular mail with respect and concern. Listen especially close to your repeat customers. Treat complaints at City Hall with a tremendous amount of respect. If people are taking time out from their vacation to complain, it is obviously important to them.

9. Stop replacing rides!

Please actually add to the number of attractions in Disney theme parks! Horizons and World of Motion were taken far before their time. Please don't allow other loved attractions to follow suit.

10. Make each park different

Each park should have it's own perk for visiting. For example, as you well know, Disneyland Paris has different versions of Haunted Mansion and Pirates of the Caribbean than the rest of the Disney parks. If you're going to duplicate an attraction for another park, make it different enough so that people will want to visit both parks.

Finally, above all us, remember this: Love your job!

Get into it and get everyone who works for you into it. Rally them as if they were troops. Make it your cause, and fight for it. Not getting your budget? Do a James Stewart-esque filibuster at a board meeting and fight for it! Truly care how it all works out in the end, like we, the true Disney fans do.

Nice Pressler articles, Al and Kevin. Good job you two! It's nice to see that you can look through all of the "Disney magic" and speak the truth. Keep up the good work, as the pressure your articles place on the Disney company must be working (new paint, cleanup etc after you post them). Maybe Disneyland will be worth its price of admission again.

We got a real bum deal when Disneyland Hotel turned off the power at 1 am and we had to get ready for our flight at 3:30 [that morning] without light, air conditioning (had to open the sliding glass door and breathe smoke from the fires nearby) clock radio, no charge on laptop, cell phone, shaver, etc. The hotel placed two light sticks near our door without a written notice about their scheduled power outage... a real disaster.

Next time I'll stay at the Howard Johnson for $60 / night. I can't believe the Disneyland Hotel gets a four-star rating, as the motels outside of the park (two-star) seem to offer more for a much better price (other than the "submersive" experience of being on park property, which is minimal during the non-peak season anyway). I could ramble on about this experience forever, but thank God that at least I didn't eat at Goofy's Kitchen...

Love your columns!!! I look forward to them all the time!

I think one of the thoughts needs to be "What would Walt have done?" The man did not compromise on quality for the sake of cost. And there is no disputing that he made lots of money. That is what is important to Eisner. Follow the successful actions Mike! Granted, times are different now and with a lawsuit every two seconds, some compromises must be made to protect the company.

The keen Imagineering is all but gone. The sheer brilliance of creating ride like Pirates and Haunted Mansion, not only the quality of the ride but the strategy of physical positioning. I mean, having a stretching room take you below the railroad tracks to outside the berm to a huge show building, hidden from view, and keeping the guests completely oblivious to where they are and have them emerge at the back door of the home? Brilliance! I can say the same for Pirates! Now we have Rocket Rods and a big spinning marble to compare.

Look at Country Bears! Keep the classic attraction (which was missed by many, including Marketing when the movie was released), build Pooh in a similar fashion, such as above Country Bears (like Alice in Wonderland... again brilliant). This would have increased the traffic for CBs and given more to do in an attraction-barron "land".

The simple fact is Walt would 1) not have allowed stupid attraction like the ones of late and 2) not allowed his Park to deteriorate to its current condition. Do what he did, the public will be back in droves and profits will "magically" rise. The formula has been discovered by Walt and does not need to be reinvented. Just plug in the correct variables!

Thanks for the opportunity to vent my frustration. See you in the Park.

P.S. Bye Paul

You mentioned that we could send in our own top ten list... well I don't have 10... but I have one:

No. 1 - Listen to your Cast members, they know the park better than anyone.... if there is a problem they will know it first.

ARGHHHH! - Part Three

© 2002 Roman Dirge - This comic may be freely distributed with this notice / credit attached

Again my special thanks to Roman for allowing us to run his comic today.