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Al Lutz
The Famous Toe-Sucking Story
(Originally posted on 4/27/97)

DrD <> wrote: So, uh, Al, could you please tell us the disgusting details of the toesucking incident that happened one morning during the press festivities for the opening of ToonTown at DL? Enquiring minds want to know.

Why DrD I'm flattered you would ask about the disgusting details of the toesucking incident that happened one morning during the press festivities for the opening of ToonTown at DL. Enquiring minds NEED to be told! ;)

A friend who's a writer invited me to join him for the week of press events for the opening of ToonTown at DL.

As you probably know, most press junkets - and *especially* Disney ones - tend to be rather swell affairs, with oodles of free things and lotsa priviliged access to events and areas that the public, roped way away from all of them of course, drools in the distance at.

I like 'em a LOT.

Part of the ultra lavish fun we experienced that week included spending a good part of the week at the DL Hotel - which meant that with the free meal coupons they provided us, we usually ate there before wandering over to DL to gawk at the brand-spanking new ToonTown, (this was before it started to fade of course).

One morning we took advantage of the free breakfast provided for all the press flacks up in the reception rooms next to the monorail station. [Imagine a room full of REALLY local weather personalities in blazers over walking shorts and sneakers with their pancake makeup already applied chatting away on cell phones about how the other channel's counterpart got paid way more than they did and you'll get the picture]

Disney decided that morning that besides offering us Mickey Mouse cartoons on giant TV screens all over the place, [and offering us every mouse shaped hot and cold permutation of breakfast food that could ever be imagined] that they had to also provide us with a live improv troup - get this - all dressed in childish P.J.s that even had button-up behinds and even were even "Disney" detailed down to carrying the occasional teddy bear. Bizzare even by a child's standards, the whole thing became quite *Twlight Zone* when you saw these folks [in their mid-twenties] outfitted that way and acting the part.

Obviously this group had probably been working extended hours throughout this event in other guises - and this morning shift caught them, in a shall we say... "giddy" [or maybe just plain "lunatic"] mood, to say the least.

They were basically working the tables, sitting down next to all these local weather folks, and pretending to be petulant children. They were fighting over breakfast, tossing the occasional box of mouse-shaped corn flakes around the table -- trying to lighten up the morning, not reailizing of course that when it came to childish behavior those local weather personalities could beat them hands down.

After a few not-too-successful tries at eliciting laughs from some of the tables [remember this was taking place at 9 AM - and who the hell can laugh at that hour] they began basically just to amuse themselves and finally - spotting one very virulently beehived Texas weather woman and her entourage, they decended upon that table and decided that, damn the torpedos, THIS group was going to be entertained -- no matter what.

Starting with tossing around corn flakes, as the table tried to ignore them, they quickly turned the whole thing into a more messy food fight which then led to each member of the troup trying to play with the food of each of the tables inhabitants.

Not getting any kind of rise out of the beehived Texas weather woman, they quickly escalated their mayhem and several of them ducked UNDER the table crawling around while the now horrified diners kept wondering what new Disney magical experience they would next be subjected to.

Finally a scream from under the table produced a clearing out - and one of the sleepsuited performers shouted out and then was joined by the group to chant for the entire room to hear ---


--- as they all gaily chased themselves around and around the table.

I have to tell you I'd NEVER seen that much breakfast food spit up before all across the room, and even thorough all that pancake make-up, I saw the beehived Texas weather woman agape and blushing deeply.

Hmmm, I wonder if she had open-toe shoes on that morning...

...It was the HIGHLIGHT of my entire trip needless to say... ;)

Now aren't ya glad ya asked? :)



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